May 1, 2003

Caring for and serving families in Tennessee, Kentucky, Georgia, Alabama,  Mississippi,
Florida, Texas, and Louisiana 

                                          
On a cloudy gray Sunday in October, my husband and I went to church.  During the announcement time of the service, a woman in our church, Beth, got up and told about a sweet thirteen year old boy from Russia who needed immediate adoption and hopefully by a family in the Nashville area.  His sisters had been adopted by a family in Hendersonville the previous spring so the hope was that the three of them could be reunited, if not in one family, then at least in the same city.  But as we all know a teenage boy is not an easy placement.   My husband and I began to nudge each other almost simultaneously.  We really felt that God was calling us to give Edward a home and a family.  

My mind raced with all the reasons we would make a good family for him.  Our youngest son had just gone off to college and our daughters are out of college so we were staring at three empty bedrooms that could easily accommodate another child – and his sisters for overnights!  We weren’t really even thinking about adopting but Edward’s story spoke to us.  We called all our children to get their reactions.  They were so excited about the possibility of sharing the deep love we feel for our family with Edward.

The next step was to call the family who had adopted his sisters and get as much info as possible.  They were wonderful and encouraging.  Evelyn said the girls had been praying every night for a family for their brother.  Over the holidays we all met each other and decided it was a match made in heaven.  We rushed to get all the paperwork finished because we knew every day counted.  Edward was 14 on December 1^st. 

By the end of January, we were ready to go to Russia to meet our new son.  We were filled with excitement and anticipation.  We met Edward on February 21.  We flew home from Moscow on March 2^nd with an excited boy who asked every hour, “How long now till I see my sisters?”  The reunion at the Nashville airport was as emotional as you can imagine.  A grand party put on by our neighbors welcomed Edward to Nashville, to his sisters, and to the Duncan family.  We are proud and happy to have Edward as our son.

(Editor’s Note:  There was not a dry eye in the entire airport, and probably the airplane as Edward was reunited with is sisters!).

 Good books recommended by the Williams family (Let me know if you have others!) 

Books: The Lost Daughters of China by Karin Evans. Evans alternates chapters between her personal experience with adoption and the socio-political complexities in China that displace so many girls. Another book we read was Adopting in China: A practical guide/an emotional journey, by Kathleen Wheeler and Doug Werner. I didn't like some of the sections written by Werner - he seemed to typify the "ugly American" stereotype when he writes about being in China (complains about the food, for example). But it has some helpful hints about getting through the home study and making the trip. (Note it has some outdated tax credit information.) Some great travel and shopping tips can be found at the web site of a Guangzhou deli take-out, Danny's Bagel: http://www.dannysbagel.com/ 

A more academic resource is West Meets East: Americans Adopt Chinese Children. I believe it was the first empirical study on the subject when it was published in 1999. It's rather dry and textbooky, but enlightening about the larger demographic picture. Also informative is Yannie Fan's personal web site about touring Chinese orphanages in 2000, http://www.usaweb1.com/chinatrip/index.htm 

Some good resources to help you think about living as a multi-cultural family are:

"Are Those Kids Yours?" American Families with Children Adopted from Other Countries by Cheri Register

Wuhu Diary by Emily Prager

Dim Sum, Bagels, and Grits by Myra Alperson (this includes terrific resource indexes)

Our Chinese Daughters Foundation, http://www.ocdf.org/ocdf/index.htm

Rainbow Kids, http://www.rainbowkids.com/

The Evan B. Donaldson Adoption Institute Newsletter, http://www.adoptioninstitute.org/ 

One of the best resources for preparing to be a multi-cultural family! It's a free on-line course: http://www.adoptionlearningpartners.org/courses/conspicuous.cfm 

Do you live in the Nashville area and want your child to learn the Russian language?   Elena Fielstein, age 12 ½ years, would like to teach children, ages 6 and older, the Russian language. Elena is from Smolensk. She has been speaking English for almost two years now and is very proficient in Russian and English. She takes Russian lessons once a week from a Russian educator. Elena’s fee is negotiable and reasonable, and the place is also negotiable--depending on what would be most convenient for both parties. The lessons could be private or in a small group. If you are interested, please call Elena’s mother, Lynda, at (615) 385-4635 or e-mail Fielstem@comcast.net  to discuss further. 

Language Playhouse in the Tampa, FL area enables children of today (12 months-16 years) to understand and participate in the bi-lingual world of tomorrow through their innovative and captivating approach to 2^nd language acquisition.  Native speakers of Spanish, French, Italian, German, Chinese and American Sign Language use a hands on approach to learning as they lead the children through a high energy, age appropriate adventure of songs, games, crafts, theater, snacks and much more presented entirely in the target language. Language Playhouse is located in Carrollwood (Tampa)  and would like to invite your playgroups to participate in a free demonstration of our Chinese classes.  Please contact our center at 813-964-8800 to schedule a day and time! 

Host an Exchange Students

High school students who will be coming to the US from China, Hong Kong, Taiwan, South Korean and Nepal are in need of host families.  They are usually here for 10 months are ages 15-18.  In the past, they have placed students with host families who have adopted.  Host families and their children really enjoy the opportunity to learn frist-hand about another culture while sharing their culture with the student.  If you are interested, please go to the Forte International Exchange Association website at :www.foreteexcahnge.org or call 1-888-866-6869 or email chris.lin@forteusa.org.


Open your heart and home to an exchange student.  They are 15-18 years old.  They are both boys and girls.  They have their own spending money and their own insurance.  They are from Russia, Germany, etc.  If you are interested the website is www.ayusa.org

We are delighted to offer you a series of Russian Classes held by Daniel Schafer, Belmont Professor. They will take place at CHI office in Brentwood from 6:30 to 8:30 pm on Thursdays, May 29, June 5 and June 12, 2003.  

May 29: Introduction to Russian Language and Alphabet - A presentation that will quickly teach the Russian alphabet and give some basic "survival phrases".

June 5: Ethnic and Religious Groups of Russia - An introduction to Russia's basic geographical environment and the peoples who live there.

June 12: Moscow, Smolensk, and Safonovo in the Context of Russian History - Gives some background on the city of Moscow that all families adopting from Russia get to visit and towns that Operation Hope families visit when they go to Russia to complete their adoptions. 

For more information and to RSVP, please contact Natalia at the office or natalia@childrenshopeint.org. We hope to see you there!

Children's Hope will host Operation Hope in Nashville for three weeks in July 2003. As Operation Hope 2003 gains momentum and more families sign up to participate in this program, we would like to let you know about a wonderful healthy sibling group who is a candidate for this summer Operation Hope. They are two brothers and a sister ages 10, 9 and 6. If you are interested in hosting these lovely children, please contact us at 615-309-8109, or at Tanya@ChildrensHopeInt.org. Operation Hope is a program, which brings orphans age 7 - 11 from Russia to spend three weeks of their vacation with American host families who are seriously interested in adopting them. 

Over 150 folks recently enjoyed the Easter Egg Hunt… We loved seeing those of you who could make it!  Thanks to Emily for all her hard work helping us decorate cookies, pin the tale on the bunny, die eggs, and hunt for some wonderful eggs!  Thanks everyone who came out…it was wonderful seeing the children all ready for Easter!

Please join us for free information meetings:

Sunday, May 18, 2003

Huntsville-Madison County Public Library, 915 Monroe Street SW, Huntsville, AL

2:00-4:00PM 

Sunday, May 25

Hampton Inn Marietta, 455 Franklin Rd, SE, Marietta, Georgia

3:00-5:00 PM 

Tuesday, May 27

Memorial Health University Medical Center, Conference Room A

4700 Waters Avenue, Savannah, GA  31405

7:00 - 9:00 PM 

Thursday, May 29

WJCT, Inc (PBS), 100 Festival Park Ave, Jacksonville, FL  32210

7:00 - 9:00 PM

May 7          Waiting Mom’s Coffee         10:00-11:00 AM      Children’s Hope Office                   

May 10        Dossier Class                       8:30-10:00 AM       Children’s Hope Office

                    Travel Class                        10:00-12:00 Noon   Children’s Hope Office 

                    Pre-Adoption Class #2        12:30-6:00 PM         Woodmont Hills Family of God

May 16        Parent Education                 6:30-8:30 PM           Children’s Hope office

                   (Waiting Parents meeting) 

May 19        Home Study Group            6:30-8:30 PM        Children’s Hope Office 

May 23       Operation Hope                     6:30 PM                   Woodmont Hills Family of God

                   Orientation #1

May 29        Russian Class                      6:30-8:30 PM           Children’s Hope Office

June 5         Russian Class                     6:30-8:30 pm            Children’s Hope Office

Before I was a Mom, I made and ate hot meals. I had unstained clothing. I had quiet conversations on the phone.
Before I was a Mom, I slept as late as I wanted, And never worried about how late I got into bed. I brushed my hair and my teeth everyday.
Before I was a Mom, I cleaned my house each day. I never tripped over toys or forgot words to lullabies.
Before I was a Mom, I didn't worry whether or not my plants were poisonous. I never thought about immunizations.

Before I was a Mom, I had never been puked on, pooped on, spit on, chewed on, peed on or pinched by tiny fingers.
Before I was a Mom, I had complete control of my thoughts, my body, and my mind. I slept all night.
Before I was a Mom, I never held down a screaming child, so that doctors could do tests, or give shots. I never looked into teary eyes and cried. I never got gloriously happy over a simple grin. I never sat up late hours at night watching a baby sleep.
Before I was a Mom, I never held a sleeping baby just because I didn't want to put it down.
I never felt my heart break into a million pieces when I couldn't stop the hurt. I never knew that something so
small could affect my life so much.
I never knew that I could love someone so much.
I never knew I would love being a Mom.
Before I was a Mom I didn't know the feeling of having my heart outside my
body. I didn't know how special it could feel to feed a
hungry baby. I didn't know that bond between a mother and
 her child. I didn't know that something so small could make
me feel so important.
Before I was a Mom, I had never gotten up in the middle of the night every 10
minutes to make sure all was okay. I had never known the warmth, the joy, the love, the heartache, the wonderment,
OR the satisfaction of being a Mom. I didn't know I was capable of feeling so much before I was, a, Mom. 

HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY AND FOR THOSE OF YOU WAITING, HAPPY MOTHER’S DAY TO BE!  If we can ever do anything to help, please do not hesitate to contact me at Brenda@childrenshopeint.org.  

We don't want to burden you with a lot of information, but we do want to help you if you are looking for a way to adopt. If not, please let us know and we will regretfully remove your name from our newsletter.   E-mail me at my address below with any question you have.  I would love to hear from you.   

Brenda

 Southeastern U.S.
 Brenda Barker, Director
 7003 Chadwick Dr. Suite 350
 Brentwood, TN  37027
 615-309-8109   Fax: 615-309-8483

 Brenda@ChildrensHope.com
 Also serving the following states: TN, KY, GA, AL, MS, FL, TX and LA